the cat who writes

Write, take naps, and take another nap

Dogs need to be trained by a cat

The cat is training the new puppy

My new bodyguard Penny, a twelve week old lab, needs to be trained. As manager of this home, it is my responsibility to train her.

From my vantage point on the kitchen chair I can see everything the puppy does.

“Penny. Sit.”


Penny is a very good listener. When I tell her to do something she listens to me.

Mrs. Hodges is really trying. She takes her out every ten minutes to go to the bathroom. She has slept in the kennel with her, and slept on the floor beside the dog when the puppy whined at night. She even wrote an article: How to potty train a puppy in 7 easy steps.

But really. Is Mrs. Hodges teaching the puppy how to behave, or is the puppy teaching Mrs. Hodges how to be a puppy?

Someone needs to be in charge of training this dog. And it appears it needs to be me, a cat.

Cats can control a puppy’s behavior by simply looking at it. As you can see from the photograph, Penny follows my instruction quickly.

I do need Mrs. Hodges to walk the dog as the dogs legs are longer than mine and the puppy likes to run, and I don’t. I never run. I only stalk and pounce. 

But I tell Mrs. Hodges what to do and she follows my instruction. 

  1. You are a person, the puppy is a dog.
  2. Don’t try to be a puppy.
  3. Do not let the puppy drag you down the street.
  4. Do not let the puppy eat its poop, pick it up and throw it away.
  5. Get the puppy really tired, so it takes a lot of cat naps later.

 Have you ever trained a puppy? If you have any suggestions for me or Mrs. Hodges, please let us know in the comments. 



About Pooh Hodges

I have had a hard life. Born to a single mother in a back alley in Wisconsin. I never knew my father. My sister died young. I am writing my story. Look for it.

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This is an animal blog. Written by animals. Humans are only necessary to type for us. We don’t have thumbs.

  • Amindele

    I have never trained a puppy, but it sounds like your doing a good job of it!

  • La McCoy

    Dear W. Pooh Hodges- Den.
    This explains why I am such a great Doggie. There were so many cats in my life when I was a little squirt. I always had such fun playing with my cat friends. I do not have any cat friends now except for you Pooh.
    Will you come and play with me.
    Love Edelweiss.

  • Laura Naughton

    Oh Pooh you have such wisdom.

    It is so true animals truly train their owners…sleeping on the floor?! We will do anything to get the pup to be quiet, but all it does is the pup knows how to tug at our hearts and behave badly and we humans still adore and love them.

    You, Pooh the indifference is so powerful tell me how to you do it???

    Trained by the dog,

  • Nina in Portugal

    Penny is adorable! And I think you’re doing a great Job Pooh! 😉 You’ll have her trained in no time.

    • Good Morning Nina,
      Thank you for your encouragement.
      If only her bladder was a little bigger. Mrs. Hodges is constantly taking her outside to pee, she hasn’t had as much time to type for me.
      Love Pooh

  • Storykeeperferris

    Loved the post! Made me laugh.

    • Good Morning Storykeeperferris,
      May I please call you Story for short? You may call me Pooh.
      I am delighted you liked my story. Laughter is good for the soul.
      All the best,
      Love Pooh

  • Carol

    I love that you are training the dog! Such wisdom in your suggestions, I especially like #4.

    • Good Morning Carol,
      Thank you for noticing my wisdom. My staff often forget that I am in charge of the home not them.
      I don’t want the puppy to eat its poop because the puppy likes to lick my face. The thought of a poopy, puppy, tongue is rather revolting.
      I wish you a wonderful day.
      Love Pooh